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A NIGHT TO REMEMBER

A NIGHT TO REMEMBER
Created by: eric
Tracks: 15
Length: 00:59:24
Keywords 1. Mix Contest 11
2. Mix Contest 11
3. Mix Contest 11
Created on 4/20/07 09:10pm
Level 6
Points 2615
Total visitors 98
Unique visitors 40
This mix was ranked #9 out of 20 entries for this contest
description:
A NIGHT TO REMEMBER:
It all started with an innocent post to the local craigslist. Two summers ago, I was living in portland. I was single. I was lonely.

One night thursday night, all alone, I browsed through the 'Missed connections' section of the local craigslist personals -- this is where you can find some of the *weirdest* shit. I read through a few, nothing interesting, until I saw this: 'HANDSOME SOFTWARE DEVELOPER -- w4m -- 23'

The body read 'You: in the coffee shop inside Borders, yelling and throwing Splenda packets at some girl who mispronounced 'Ayn Rand' while talking to her date. Me: At the counter, buying 'Tantric Sex for Dummies,' a book on cooking, an AWK pocket-reference book and a book which detailed how much fun could be had with black powder. Also, I with 99 of my supermodel friends.

PS - 13 of them are from Brazil.'

Since I was yelling and throwing things (I was using mugs, not Splenda packets) at that sadly misinformed pseudo-intellectual type for butchering my favourite socialist's name, I thought I'd respond. . .

tracklist

1 Air : Sexy Boy
I write her back, letter her know that I've found her post and that I am the man she seeks. Not being one to w [...]
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Track 2 from Moon Safari
Length: 00:05:00
Year: 1998
Track Description:
I write her back, letter her know that I've found her post and that I am the man she seeks. Not being one to wait on a woman, I go back to doing my normal evening activity -- meticulously cleaning every square inch of my living quarters (with ammonia, chlorine and q-tips) wearing nothing but a my socks, underwear and a bandanna. Also, I was listening to Genesis.
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2 Death from Above 1979 : Little Girl (Mstrkrft Edition)
I check my e-mail about an hour later and she's written back. Her and her 99 international supermodel friends [...]
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Track 5 from Romance Bloody Romance
Length: 00:03:36
Year: 2005
Track Description:
I check my e-mail about an hour later and she's written back. Her and her 99 international supermodel friends are in town for one night (for a sexy model convention, I assume).

Anyway, she wants to hang. Hang tough. Super tough.

I give her the deets and hop in the shower.
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3 RJD2 : Exotic Talk
An hour goes by and I hear a knock on my door. I open it to see her, looking gorgeous. Behind her, the longest [...]
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Track 2 from Since We Last Spoke
Length: 00:03:43
Year: 2004
Track Description:
An hour goes by and I hear a knock on my door. I open it to see her, looking gorgeous. Behind her, the longest motherfucking limo I've ever seen in my goddamn life. It must have been two city blocks long. It had two stories and was jacked up higher than GRAVEDIGGER. There was a lap pool, a hot tub and a shooting range in the basement as well.

I hop in, introduce myself to all of her 99 friends with some serious ass slapping, you know, to show off how classy I am.
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4 American Analog Set : Know by Heart (Her Space Holiday Remix)
We start the night off by driving to the park. We get out of the limo and everyone starts strapping on lazerta [...]
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Track 4 from Updates
Length: 00:03:03
Year: 0000
Track Description:
We start the night off by driving to the park. We get out of the limo and everyone starts strapping on lazertag gear. She throws me a eight-barrel lazergun (think tommy-gun) and I immediately start shooting everyone.

About 10 minutes into the third round, I gash open my shoulder on a low-hanging branch. To show these women I'm strictly business, I unravel a bit of one girl's cable knit-sweater and sew my gaping wound up with a needle I stole from a kindly porcupine. One girl passed out because of the blood, but I performed some secret magic that I learned the day before and brought her back to life.
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5 The Go! Team : Junior Kickstart
We get back in the limo, tired from all the sweet lasertag we just played. I have the bright idea of stopping [...]
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Track 9 from Thunder, Lightning, Strike
Length: 00:03:32
Year: 2005
Track Description:
We get back in the limo, tired from all the sweet lasertag we just played. I have the bright idea of stopping by a liquor store. The girls start throwing handing me money, and before I know it, I have more than $65,000. We roll to the local liquor store and clean the place out. Cash money.

We then proceed to drive around town, drink Stoly & soda and laugh about politics and life's funny things, but eventually it all goes to pot and I find myself having a 'rum fight' with the Brazilian girls.
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6 The Avalanches : Flight Tonight
Finally, we roll to the local airport. We board the girls' gulf stream V-SP. I'm sitting in my leather, vibrat [...]
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Track 6 from Since I Left You...
Length: 00:03:53
Year: 2001
Track Description:
Finally, we roll to the local airport. We board the girls' gulf stream V-SP. I'm sitting in my leather, vibrating seat when the pilot comes over to me and asks if I want to fly. I accept. He hands me some gold wings and a super-fancy pilot hat as I climb into the cockpit. I prep for takeoff as I down another vodka drink. About 20 seconds after liftoff, I go all Challenger and drive the thing into the ground.

The women all have their sexy bodies in tact, but I think a few of them might have permanent brain damage from the burning styrofoam fumes. No harm, no foul.

We wait for 10 minutes (and have another drink) while they taxi out another V-SP. This time, I decide not to fly and opt for a 200-hand foot massage.
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7 UNKLE : Celestial Annihilation
In the air, we do a little dancing, a little bumping and a little grinding. I honestly don't see anything wron [...]
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Track 8 from Psyence Fiction
Length: 00:04:45
Year: 1998
Track Description:
In the air, we do a little dancing, a little bumping and a little grinding. I honestly don't see anything wrong with it, for the record. We all look really hot. Someone turns on a strobe-light and the smoke machine. We dance until we feel winded, then we all take a break and watch The Simpsons while the girls grill me up some kosher hot dogs. De-lish.
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8 Minus the Bear : Fine + 2 Points
We land in Vegas and drink some more vodka. The girls go to 'freshen up,' which takes a long time, since, you [...]
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Track 1 from They Make Beer Commercials Like This
Length: 00:03:51
Year: 2004
Track Description:
We land in Vegas and drink some more vodka. The girls go to 'freshen up,' which takes a long time, since, you know, there are 100 of them and only one bathroom. I read about data structures while they
shower.
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9 Beck : Ghettochip Malfunction [Hell Yes] (8 Bit Remix)
We hop in another limo and make out way out to the desert. This limo is a super-long McLaren f1. While we're d [...]
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Track 7 from Guerolito
Length: 00:02:39
Year: 2005
Track Description:
We hop in another limo and make out way out to the desert. This limo is a super-long McLaren f1. While we're driving on the highway, we see a semi truck with a ramp. We drive up inside of it (a tricky
maneuver, since both vehicles are moving). We get flamethrowers attached to the car and a thingy that shoots out oil behind us. The oil thing is kind of lame, but still, flamethrowers...

We arrive at a deserted location and get out of the limo. Out of nowhere, a girl shows up with a forklift and some really big boxes. I pull out my trusty crowbar and pry a box open -- fireworks and hand grenades. The girls all sit and cheer while I light off some really big (DISNEY BIG) fireworks and blow up cactuses (I HATE THEM SO MUCH) with handgrenades.
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10 cLOUDDEAD : Square
We get back in the car and go downtown. We drink more in transit. We show up and at a clothing store and I get [...]
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Track 2 from Peel Sessions
Length: 00:01:08
Year: 0000
Track Description:
We get back in the car and go downtown. We drink more in transit. We show up and at a clothing store and I get the flyest of all fly gear -- a maroon velvet jumpsuit (with matching bucket hat), some original Air Force Ones and a whole shitload of platinum jewelry. Next thing I know, I'm getting a custom-made diamond grill installed. Sick.
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11 Daft Punk : Human After All
Back in the car, we head to the busiest, most packed club we can find. This song starts playing the second I r [...]
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Track 1 from Human After All
Length: 00:05:19
Year: 2005
Track Description:
Back in the car, we head to the busiest, most packed club we can find. This song starts playing the second I roll in. Every single person in the club tops and looks at how awesome I am. My throng of women behind me, writhing with pleasure (just the pleasure of being around me), I pop in a fresh stick of Green Extra and start breakdancing. My breakdancing is so good that one random bystander lost his vision and one of the barkeeps actually had a seizure. Not just any seizure, a GRAND MOTHERFUCKIN' MAL.
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12 Ratatat : Stomp (Young Buck, T.I. & Ludacris)
We roll into the VIP room, which is kind of disappointing, since there are a lot of people there and I know fo [...]
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Track 1 from Remixes Vol. II
Length: 00:05:06
Year: 2007
Track Description:
We roll into the VIP room, which is kind of disappointing, since there are a lot of people there and I know for a fact that some of them weren't very VIP at all. Anyway, I go all Ryu-from-street-fighter-II
and get everyone the fuck out of there. I relax on the couch while the girls make me laugh with their best Charlie Chaplin imitations.
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13 The Faint : Glass Danse (Paul Oakenfold Remix)
As we roll back to the main dancefloor, I accidentally spill my Grey Goose and Collins on some dude. He flips [...]
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Track 3 from Danse Macabre Remixes
Length: 00:05:39
Year: 0000
Track Description:
As we roll back to the main dancefloor, I accidentally spill my Grey Goose and Collins on some dude. He flips out. The DJ does that 'stop the music with a record scratch' thing and all of a sudden, everyone is in a big circle around us. They start snapping like in Westside Story, which distracted me just long enough for the guy to lash his Crocodile-Dundee-size knife across my face. It grazes my cheek, but before a drop of blood can hit the ground, a girl is applying a bandaid. Long story short, it was a long and arduous battle, but I ended up whooping the guy's ass. I even did Scorpion's fatality on him, which really impressed the throng of women.
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14 Michael Jackson : P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)
Turns out that the guy I just whooped on was the world's biggest slave trader. He also sold crack at elementar [...]
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Track 8 from Thriller
Length: 00:03:58
Year: 1982
Track Description:
Turns out that the guy I just whooped on was the world's biggest slave trader. He also sold crack at elementary schools. Anyway, everyone is so impressed with my raw skill and power that all they can do is
stare.

Marion Berry shows up and gives me the quadruple-purple heart for bravery (much more important than a regular purple heart) and a $500,000 check for being awesome.
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15 Subtle : Flying Horse Plans
We file out of the club, back into the limo, back onto the plane and head home.
As I stood on my doorstep [...]
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Track 1 from summer
Length: 00:04:12
Year: 0000
Track Description:
We file out of the club, back into the limo, back onto the plane and head home.
As I stood on my doorstep, still rockin' my icy grill, the girl looks me in the eyes and tells me that she'll never forget me. She kisses my giant diamond-encrusted platinum-knuckles (brass is whack) and stares me in the eyes. She tells me that she wants to give me something I'll never forget.

I close my eyes. When I open them, I'm holding a jetpack and a scroll which contains a secret incantation on how to go all invisible and shit.
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Tag Board

The MLK Badge badge
The MLK Badge
Because Civil Rights rock (and roll).
awarded on 2009-03-07

Level 18
This mix consists of win, especially the descriptions...
9/20/08 07:18pm
no badge
Level 5
fucking ridiculous, in a good way.
1/11/08 12:32pm
The Newbie Badge badge
The Newbie Badge
The true sign of a fresh mixtaper. This badge is awarded to everyone. Don't feel special.
awarded on 2006-08-03

Level 9
This is not a note about musical content, but just a reminder that Ayn Rand is not a socialist (so she certainly could not be your favourite socialist!). In fact, she's completely anti-socialist. Read WE THE LIVING for more.
6/11/07 11:12am
The Patton Badge badge
The Patton Badge
Driving Lamborghini's and sipping on martinis. This badge is for those who express their love of Mike Patton through mixtape.
awarded on 2008-08-07

Level 27
we have five, count 'em... five, of the same bands on our contest mixes. but i think i like yours better. dammit. sweet story, too.
4/21/07 03:26am
TEAM 97 -- Third Place badge
TEAM 97 -- Third Place
Long before being knocked up with Eddie Murphy's illegitimate child, Scary Spice was on top of the world. Now, she's nothing but washed up. It's kind of sad, really. Just by scoring third place in this contest, you've got infinitely more street cred than Scary. Congrats!
awarded on 2007-06-17

Level 18
you spelled stoli wrong, used the word "deets," and i swear you've used "sexy boy" before - BUT you fucking BREAKDANCED AND LAZERTAGGED TO AAS-HSH REMIX. therefore you are amazing. ++++++++ up the arse.
4/21/07 12:38am
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